Ugh.
Ugh pretty much sums it up. It's that fun time of year for me when the S.A.D. starts kicking into high gear.
When the wha-huh kicks in? S.A.D.'s fairly well known, but if you haven't heard of it, here: (From the Seasonal Affective Disorder Association's site)
SAD (Seasonal Affective Disorder) is a type of winter depression that affects an estimated half a million people every Winter between September and April, in particular during December, January and February.
It is caused by a biochemical imbalance in the hypothalamus due to the shortening of daylight hours and the lack of sunlight in winter.
For many people SAD is a seriously disabling illness, preventing them from functioning normally without continuous medical treatment.
It sucks. Everything's a big hairy drama to my sun-starved brain, I sob uncontrollably over every little thing, and often over nothing. The house is a wreck because I can't keep up with it. My poor kids would be a mess too if Kev didn't help out so much. September's the worst, because I'm moving into the full-fledged depression part, and the transition is particularly difficult. I use a combination of light therapy (Ten minute tanning sessions here and there) and non-sedative antidepressant drugs, which help. But then there's the added guilt of "I'm tanning myself into an early skin-cancer grave", PLUS the all-too-widespread assumption that people who take antidepressants are weak, can't/won't deal on their own, need to suck it up, blah blah.
On top of this, I've gone back to work part time and had some other physical problems. My blood/iron count bottomed out, leading to the funfest that was a five hour IV treatment, to be repeated every three months. With lots of fun bloodwork every week in between. Bleargh.
I'm sure things will look less bleak soon, but right now it's midnight and I can't sleep for anything. Things always look their worst then.
3 comments:
Does light therapy have to be in the form of tanning with the cancer risks? Can you just be in a really bright room, maybe play a tape of some nature sounds, look at images of bright blue skies?
This time of year is rough. I get bummed through these months too, right after labor day, even though the weather is still humid, August, Summer weather. Except for the calendar and the fact that it gets dark a little earlier each night, it still IS Summer which I keep reminding myself.
Good luck and hang in there. The way time moves, it will be Spring again before you know it...
We also replaced all the light bulbs in the house with a more "sunlight"-colored bulb.
That seemed to help her too. Plus having all the lights on as bright as they can go in whichever room she happens to be in. That seems to help too.
Plus lots of snuggles to help her cope :-)
I, too, feel very depressed throughout the winter months. While I like the winter holidays I do NOT like it being dark so much!!
Good luck this winter!
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