Saturday, December 31, 2005

THINKS Vol. 3: Final Thinks for 2005

As the year ends... I realized I had several Thinks sitting in my Inbox to be blogged.

For my final 2005 post, here is Volume Three of my Thinks.

Yet another meme-type thing. This one gives you a movie title for your name:



QuizGalaxy.com!

Take this quiz at QuizGalaxy.com

As I've become a Browncoat and listened to Firefly/Serenity podcasts, I've discovered a really cool Filksong called "Mal's Song" that uses the Ballad of Serenity (the TV show theme song) as the chorus. Other FireFilksongs and stuff are available too.

Also, the official Browncoats forum is closing soon - so a fan made a new forum website for those discussions.

On one of my previous book reviews, the author just posted a comment today! How cool is that!

Speaking of cool: How cool am I? Scroll down just a bit on that page.

Mind&Media has posted a Year in Review.

One of my coworkers found a cool website for buying Used Computers. I'm thinking that's where I'll get our next laptop.



QuizGalaxy.com!

Take this quiz at QuizGalaxy.com

And finally, if you're like me and love your local library... but occasionally can't get the books or DVDs back on time, then the Library Elf is perfect for you! It will send you reminders if your books are past due or about to be due, and send you reminders if you have a hold ready for pickup - and tell you what else you have checked out too! That is very cool.

I guess that's it for 2005. Hope everyone has a safe and happy New Years celebration. See you next year!


EDIT: MCF gave us an award: BEST inspirational family blog lacking only a blue grid. (He misses my Decepticon background ...I'll have to do something about that soon.)

Yay!
Edit (again): I forgot to mention the Voice of God.

"THINKS": Term combining the words Things and Links: an assortment of images, links, games, trivia, memes, minutia, and whatnot found while browsing and mentioned collectively in a blog or message-board posts.



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Domesticity, yay! Also, other stuff.

I spent a good chunk of the morning being all housewife-ish. Among other things, I did scads of laundry. This included ironing Kev's shirts and handkerchiefs. All I needed was a string of pearls and an apron! The June Cleaver image was negated a bit by the Mp3 player in my pocket, blaring so loudly that Kev came over at one point, fished it out of my pocket, and turned it down while informing me that he could hear it from across the room.

Destructo-boy rides again. A few weeks ago, I flipped out over the neverending mountains of toys that the younger kids refused to pick up. When my freak-out was done, all of Alexander and Catherine's toys were gone from their rooms. A large chunk went to Goodwill. Another chunk went in the trash. The rest, stayed in my room, to be given back over time as they learned to take care of their things better. Alexander recently got back his train set. He and Catherine spent the morning constructing a railroad that traveled all over his bedroom. The thing was huge.
Today, he got back his remote control scale model Humvee. He gleefully sat on his bed and proceeded to open a can of you-know-what on that railway. That Hummer is racing around his room, demolishing every chunk of track, train, and small wooden scenery in the room. And Alexander is the happiest boy ever.
Oops, he seems to be done with the railway. Now he's going after his sister. I just had to break up a noisy fight. He had Catherine treed on the sofa while she shrieked at him to "Get that thing back in your room!" [snicker] Hard to discipline when you're trying not to laugh.

Elizabeth remains away from their noise and bickering as she prefers most times, hanging out on the girls' top bunk, visiting Narnia.

Does anyone know if you can reload a Simon gift card? Turns out it's a very handy thing to have, and I don't want to pay for a new prepaid Visa when I've already got one. Simon's FAQ isn't telling.


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Thursday, December 29, 2005

Year in Review Meme: 2005

Found this at Mommy Brain.

What did you do in 2005 that you've never done before?
Blogged semi-regularly.

Did you keep your New Years' resolutions and will you make more for next year?
I don't make New Year's Resolutions.

Did anyone close to you give birth?
Rubi had a hysterectomy. Does that count?

Did anyone close to you die?
My buddy from college radio, Ed, passed away early in the year.

What countries did you visit?
Narnia, the `Verse, oh wait... those aren't real places.

What would you like to have in 2006 that you lacked in 2005?
Extra cash.

What date from 2005 will remain etched in your memory and why?
Visiting Eds grave with Rubi and a couple of college friends.

What was your biggest achievement of the year?
Taking a weeks vacation from work over Christmas.

What was your biggest failure?
Bill paying.

Did you suffer illness or injury?
Other that the standard colds every three months or so... no.

What was the best thing you bought?
Firefly and Serenity on DVD.

Where did most of your money go?
Away.

What did you get really, really, really excited about?
Firefly.

Compared to this time last year are you:
a. Happier or sadder?
About the same.

b. Thinner or fatter?
...fatter. Thanks.

c. Richer or poorer?
About the same.

What do you wish you'd done more of?
Make money.

What do you wish you'd done less of?
Spend money.

How did you spend Christmas?
Busy for the week of, but Christmas day was nice: Morning at home with Rubi and the kids.
Then off to her parents house where we spent most of the rest of the day.
We had brunch there, did presents, played games, had dinner, then we went home and did a bunch of nothing.

Did you fall in love in 2005?
Everyday I fall in love even more with Rubi.

What was your favorite TV show?
Of 2005? Firefly, if that counts, since I basically discovered it in 2005.

What was the best book you read?
I read a bunch. None really stand out as "the best", I read so many good ones.

What was your greatest musical discovery of 2005?
That WinMX still works.

What did you want and get?
An MP3 player from Rubi for Christmas! Yay! Now it's easier to listen to all those podcasts I download!

What did you want and not get?
Firefly on DVD and Star Wars Episode 3.
We just ordered Firefly though, but it probably won't be here before the new year.

What was your favorite film this year?
Serenity or The Chronicles of Narnia. Both were good.

What did you do on your birthday?
I honestly don't remember.

What one thing would have made your year immeasurably more satisfying?
Being debt free.

How would you describe your personal fashion concept in 2005?
Jeans and a polo shirt. Two bits.

What kept you sane?
God - he promised a peace that passes understanding, and I claim that promise daily.
Rubi - the anchor for my occasionally listing ship of life.
And finally, Escapism into books and movies.

What political issue stirred you the most?
Politics. Ugh.

Who did you miss?
Rubi, every time we're apart.

Who was the best new person you met?
I don't think I've met anyone new this year.

Tell us a valuable life lesson you learned in 2005.
I answer too many memes.

Quote a song lyric that sums up your year.
"...Blessed be your name
When the sun's shining down on me
When the world's all as it should be
Blessed be your name

Blessed be your name
On the road marked with suffering
Oh, There's pain in the offering
Blessed be your name

Every blessing you pour out,
I turn back to praise
When the darkness closes in, Lord
Still I will say...
Blessed be the name of the Lord
Blessed be your name
Blessed be the name of the Lord
Blessed be your glorious name

You give and take away
You give and take away
My heart will choose to stay
Well Blessed be your name"

Because, even though life may seem hard, God is still an Awesome God, and deserves our worship - and we need to praise Him for giving us life so that we can experience His Grace in the bad times and in the good times.


That's it for memes for 2k5 (maybe).


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Wednesday, December 28, 2005

Procrastination Post.

Found this "meme" at Unfinished Work. It's supposed to be a procrastinating post to keep me from doing something productive.  But I've been up since 4:30 this morning (had to work dayshift instead of my usual 2nd shift), and I've already posted three other things today (that were way past due).
 
My name ... Puddintain
My childhood ambition ... To be a radio DJ
My fondest memory ... Memes! Nothing but Memes! (Wait, that's a nightmare)
My soundtrack ... is still in post-production.
My retreat ... will be my greatest advance!
My wildest dream ... Memes! Nothing but - wait, I've done that already.
My proudest moment ... sheesh, too many to name. Most recently, when Elizabeth decided all on her own to get baptized, and saw that desire through.
My biggest challenge ... not procrastinating.
My alarm clock ... Die! Die! Must sleep more!
My perfect day ... Sleep in. Eat. Nap. Family time. Eat. Nap. Sleep. Never Drive.
My first job ... Little Caesers Pizza.
My indulgence ... Cake. Pizza. Cheesecake. uh... food?
My last purchase ... gas for the van. Fun purchase: Serenity.
My favorite movie ... too many to name. Star Wars, Serenity, the latest Chronicles of Narnia.
My inspiration ... has perspiration in a rythm nation but no glaciation. (What in Tarnation?!)
My life ... Isn't that a Bon Jovi song?
My card ... has the wrong Zip Code on it. My suggestion: Don't order business cards off the internet at 3 o'clock in the morning.
 
After filling out memes, I keep remembering I'm supposed to be using titles of Queen songs to answer them... oh well.  Maybe I'll do the next meme that way.
 
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Review: Mock n Roll

From Mind&Media, I received a copy of Mock n Roll by Paul Aldrich.
A cute musical comedy CD, not quite as kid-friendly as I expected.
Don't get me wrong: there's absolutely nothing wrong with this CD, no explicit lyrics or anything like that - It's completely clean; just some of the humor I don't want to have to explain to a five year old. I'd say the humor is maybe for anyone over thirteen years of age. Younger than that and they just won't get it, or you might have to explain some concepts that younger kids aren't ready to understand.
Samples of the songs are available on Paul's website.
I first described this as a "cute" CD. It's not side-splitting funny. It's "thinking funny". You'll be saying to yourself, "Oh yeah, I know exactly what he means" when he sings about driving through the night and coming upon a glowing sign that lets you know you can feed your Slurpy craving. Or you'll agree (begrudgingly) when he sings that he's got cable TV and a modem, but should stop wasting his time with those and learn to love his "brothers and sisters" instead. And you'll laugh at the ridiculousness of the political correctness of Gilligan's P.C. Island. And, if you're like me, you'll laugh at the Dyslexic Love Song, even though the song doesn't accurately describe dyslexia (unless you're a conediam).
There's more to find and enjoy on the CD, and it's all fun; plus more humor to explore on Paul's website.


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Review: God Is The Gospel

From Mind&Media, I received a copy of John Piper's God Is The Gospel.

An excellent book reminding us what exactly the gospels in the Bible are trying to tell us.
I found this book to be very interesting. I'd be reading, and just starting to lose interest because it seemed the author was long-winded, when Bam! - he says something important or interesting that instantly grabs my attention right back into the text. At times it seems he is belaboring a point, and then the point becomes so fascinating that I have to keep reading.
This book needs to be studied, not browsed through or picked up on whim. It requires the readers concentration on the topic, and pays off by reminding us that God is the ultimate goal of Christianity - not being good people, or singing worship songs in church once a week - but eternity with God. And I can't do justice to explaining that point in a few words - that's why John Piper wrote the book.

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Review: Nature Never Stops Talking

From Mind&Media, I received a copy of Samuel J. Alibrando's book Nature Never Stops Talking. It's a collection of articles on nature and, basically how amazing God is for creating it.

The author doesn't bash you over the head with religion. Instead, he subtly evokes a world-view where God is the Creator, and that's refreshing in any book. When I first got the book, I expected a series of essays on how the author was walking in the woods and heard the crickets chirping and that reminded him of the angels singing praises to God - or something like that. That's not what I got. Instead, the articles and essays are well thought out and researched observations of the facts of everyday life, nature, science, mathematics, astronomy, etc. and how amazing it is that God simply spoke the world into existence creating all these things.

This is a great table-top book for visitors to pick up and browse, or for anyone that loves nature, and loves our Creator-God.



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Saturday, December 24, 2005

Christmas Meme

ReGifted by MCF.

1. Hot Chocolate or apple cider?
Umm... Chocolate Milk?

2. Turkey or Ham?
Turkey.

3. Do you get a Fake or Real you cut it yourself christmas tree?
I'd prefer artificial, since that's what I grew up with. Rubi prefers real (that someone else cuts) since that's what she grew up with, and she likes the smell. I don't like the mess, maintenance, and disposal of real trees.

4. Decorations on the outside of your house?
No. I'm too lazy for that. Plus... don't want to make people look at the ugly that is the outside of our house.

5. Snowball fights or sleddin?
Ok! where and when?

6. Do you enjoy Going downtown shopping?
We don't have much shopping downtown. Our shopping mecca is "The East Side", and I abhor it.
7. Favorite Christmas song?
Can't think of one. I like many of them, especially the traditional ones. And often sung by Country music artists. I don't really like country music, but the artists sure can sing Christmas music!

8. How do you feel about Christmas movies?
Scrooged and the animated Grinch movie are the best!

9. When is it too early to start listening to Christmas music?
Before December 15th is too early in my book. Before that, and I'm sick of hearing them by Christmas Day.

10. Stockings before or after presents?
Gosh... I can't remember. Seems sometimes the stocking stuffers would spoil the gifts, as they were supporting items. Other times, stocking stuffers were just trinkets, or additional small gifts and candies that could go before or after. Rubi says we do them before.

11. Carolers, do you or do you not watch and listen to them?
We don't get Carolers. If we did, I'd probably watch, applaud, and maybe even offer them hot chocolate if I had styrofoam cups in the house.

12. Go to someone elses house or they come to you?
Always go to someone elses house. Our house is not for entertaining. Too small and kid friendly.

13. Do you read the Christmas Story? If so when?
Usually. I think I forgot to last year. But I try to make that a tradition. If I remember, I read it just before we open presents.

14. What do you do after presents and dinner?
Usually it's dinner then presents - then, depending on where we are, the adults sit around and chat while the kiddos play. Or we pack up quickly and race to another parents house. This we're lucky and don't have to rush at all. I took vacation time for the entire week around Christmas, and We're doing Christmas Eve at my parents and Day at Rubi's parents.

15. What is your favorite holiday smell?
Don't think I have one.

16. Ice skating or walking around the mall?
Why is napping not on that list? I guess I'd rather ice skate, even though I'm horrible at it and have only been two or three times in my entire life (once, before we were married, when I tried to fix up Rubi with my best friend! But that's another story!) I dislike the mall that much.

17. Do you open a present or presents on Christmas Eve, or wait until Christmas day?
Depends. The kids, always on Christmas morning. Sometimes Rubi can't wait though, so she and I might do our Christmas on Christmas Eve after the kids have gone to bed.

18. Favorite Christmas memory?
Hmm... the only one I can really think of is when I was young, one year instead of everyone coming to my parents house, we went to one the apartment of my middle sister. It snowing, but not much. I guess that one stands out because it was different from the status quo.

19. Favorite Part about winter?
The quiet calmness when the ground is covered with fresh snow.

20. Ever been kissed under mistletoe?
That's what my darling Rubi is for. I need to go find her now!


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Wednesday, December 21, 2005

The six (ish) degrees of who?

Just wondering how many people will get why this was funny. Kev and I were talking in the car today, and the subject of that wretched Alien movie came up. (Resurrection?) I asked him who was in it, and he responded [sic] "Sigourney Reaver". His slip made us both laugh. Did anyone else get the joke and giggle?


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Buy This DVD Now!


Serenity came out yesterday on DVD.
This movie rocks! You need to buy it.
It's based on the equally rocking, yet short-lived and canceled TV series Firefly.



Buy these DVDs from the links here, or from Amazon.com or from your local retailer -
Just BUY THEM!

You won't be sorry.

Rubi and I came to be Firefly fans only recently. In fact, I only watched the shows just before the movie came out in theatres. Rubi only started watching shortly after that. Now we're big fans.

I've subscribed to two different Firefly podcasts. And just today, I became a Browncoat!

Some other Firefly links you might be interested in include:
Another Serenity Review
FireFlyFans.net
Serenity: The Official Movie Website


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Tuesday, December 20, 2005

MCFAT Vol. IV

MCF has another Astonishing Test.
 
1) Does the departure of any one radio disc jockey, no matter who it is, merit a radio station changing its name, firing some DJs, and hiring others as they rearrange their schedule? I'm thinking specifically of 92.3 KROCK, soon to be known as “92.3 FREE”, but readers are free to answer the question on general principal.
Absolutely Not.

2) What's the absolute worst last-minute gift you've ever given someone, and how do you feel about it today?
Can't remember.  I'm sure there were bunches though.

3) Which song would you say most influenced and/or changed your taste in music?
Either: One Vision by Queen, because before I heard that song during the Iron Eagle movie, and subsequently bought the soundtrack, and then everything else by Queen - I hadn't really listened to rock music, or classic rock (or movie soundtracks either).
Or: Beethoven's 9th Symphony, specifically, the last movement.  If I hadn't heard this particular piece of music in music class, I probably wouldn't given a rat's behind about classical music. Now I love it.

4) You can either have a passive mental super power, or an active physical one. Which would you prefer and why?
What defines "passive" in this situation. Passive as in I just sit there and do stuff with my mind, or passive as in my powers don't have a physical effect?  Let's say my passive mental power is to be able to completely and thoroughly communicate with electronic devices. Does that count.  Being able to do this, I could reprogram or influence devices, computers, toasters, ATMs etc. to do my bidding.  Is that passive?
Active Physical Power: Comedy!
 
5) Would you be comfortable with fame?
Maybe.

6) Since people thought the last test was too hard, I'll throw in an easy one: list as many prepositions as you'd like.
"Hey baby, is it hot in here, or is that just you?"  Oh wait, you said prEpositions... Dang! These tests are too hard!
 
 
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Saturday, December 17, 2005

Pointless Post

Because we haven't posted anything in about a week, I present you with:

The Pointless Post!

I'm thinking about changing the name of this blog to:


a) Hot Chick and Fat Guy.



b) A Dork and The Girl Who Puts Up With-I mean Loves-Him


c) Why is that pretty lady lounging in front of a cardboard cutout of some strange guy?

Okay, not really.
Like I said: Pointless post.


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Sunday, December 11, 2005

The worst Christian witness on the planet.

Okay, maybe I'm not THAT bad, but I'm not all that great. Ugh. We took one of Elizabeth's friends, C., to church with us today. When I dropped her off at home, she announced to her mom that she wanted to be baptised. Mom, who I don't think is a Christian, looked rather uncomfortable, and there was silence all around. [cringe] So I piped up, and babbled for a few minutes about how it was something she needed to discuss with her mom, and that there were some classes our church would want her to take first. She said it again a few minutes later, and I fumbled again.

I totally blew it. There was a great opportunity to talk to her mom a bit and find out how much experience with Christianity C. has, what she knows, etc. C. has only been to church with us twice, and I think that's the only time she's been to church. She loves it, and wants to come more, but an alternating-weekend-custody thing prevents her from coming with us every weekend. I'm positive C. only is interested in Baptism at this point because of Elizabeth's recent Baptism, and because another one of their Bible study classmates was baptised today. But it was a great opening, and I feel like I dropped the ball.

Her mom and I talked more about the next time she could come with us. Next weekend is Dad's weekend, then it's Christmas, then it's Dad's weekend again, so the following weekend we can take her again. She was bummed about having to wait so long. I'm going to have to work harder at calling her mom on Fridays to let her know we can pick C. up if she wants to come.


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Thursday, December 08, 2005

Four Things

FOUR JOBS YOU'VE HAD IN YOUR LIFE
Radio DJ
Sno-cone trolley driver
Telemarketer (*shudders*)
9-1-1 Dispatcher
 
FOUR MOVIES YOU COULD WATCH OVER AND OVER
Star Wars
Highlander
Hudson Hawk
Stargate
 
FOUR CITIES/TOWNS YOU'VE LIVED IN
Evansville ...that's it.
 
FOUR TV SHOWS YOU LOVE TO WATCH
Stargate SG1
Stargate Atlantis
BattleStar Galactica
Firefly
 
FOUR PLACES YOU'VE BEEN ON VACATION
Nashville
Memphis
Orlando
Troy, MI
 
FOUR WEBSITES YOU VISIT DAILY
Peering Into Darkness
Chron.com for their custom comics page
 
FOUR OF YOUR FAVOURITE FOODS
Pizza
Shyler's Barbecue
Cake
Steak
 
FOUR PLACES YOU'D RATHER BE RIGHT NOW
Snuggled up on the couch with Rubi watching something from the Jossverse.
Turoni's having pizza with my family.
Shylers having bbq with my family.
Actually, I'm pretty happy with where I am at now: at home, on my day off, out of the snow/sleet, blogging while Rubi and Elizabeth watch Ice Princess (chick flick) on the tube behind me.

 
 
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Frosty

Today was the first snow of the season for us.
School let out at 11:30am and I brought the kids home.
A couple of hours later, the kids went out and played in the snow.
They made snow angels, had snowball fights, Elizabeth and Alexander seemed to be playing some kind of snow-tag, and Elizabeth made a snowman.
Forecasters say were supposed to get 2-3 inches of snow before it finishes up tonight. Right now, it looks like we've got less than an inch of it, plus some slush that fell for a few hours before the snow proper started.


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Wednesday, December 07, 2005

Grouchy? Me?!?

Donald Result


Donald Duck (uh-huh... sure)


Which DISNEY character are you most like?
brought to you by Quizilla


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THINKS Vol. 2

Check out Guerrilla Marketing for the forthcoming Serenity DVD.

As a child of the 1980's, I enjoyed many of the movies of the day. Most, I probably didn't see until the 90's though, or at least until they made it to network television. Heavily edited.

I'm sure we've all thought it about at one time or another... How exactly would I go about destroying the Earth? Wait, you haven't thought about how I would destroy the... I've thought about it, and you've thought about how you... Oh nevermind!

My co-workers that work the dayshift (7am-3pm) enjoy passing their downtime watching animals live on the internet, specifically: the learn if the bad guys live nearby.


"THINKS": Term combining the words Things and Links: an assortment of images, links, games, trivia, memes, minutia, and whatnot found while browsing and mentioned collectively in a blog or message-board posts.


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Look what I found!

Check it out, moms!

http://www.momsbudget.com/forums/index.php?sid=c5d26af974d8a4801a1f0c0b184bcdcf

Credit goes to Lisa, my super cool internet buddy. She came across it, thought of me, and IM-ed me right away with a link. Thanks, Lisa, you're wonderful!

Moms, go, take a look, register. I'll see you there!


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Tuesday, December 06, 2005

No It's Not Hard. These Are Fun!

It's time once again for another rousing edition of the Mysterious Cloaked Figure's Astonishing Test! Inquiring cloaked minds want to know:

1) What, in your opinion, was the best finale to a television series? I know these things are frequently difficult to narrow down, so if you cannot choose one, narrow it down to a reasonable number, perhaps three.

Good:
Star Trek DS9 was pretty good.
Friends was good too.
Angel was good too. But Wesley?!?

Bad:
The actual final episode of Cheers bit, but the very end was good - I still believe Sammy is down in that bar serving drinks to Norm.
The Farscape finale blew - "the series is over and you end it that way?!?" At least the fans demanded some resolution in the Peacekeepers War, and that was okay as a series finale.
The Mad About You finale should never have been made. Rubi sat there saying "uh... what just happened?"

If you can count Objects In Space as the series "finale" of Firefly, the episode was excellent - but not great as a finale.

2) You wake up to get the morning paper when you notice something is wrong. The sky is green and the grass is blue. Birds are swimming and fish are flying. Explain.

Must be Thursday. I never could get the hang of Thursdays.

And I don't read the morning paper.

3) How did you lose your first tooth?

From my mouth, I guess. Seriously, I don't remember.

4) What's the strangest thing you or someone you know has made out of snow?

Snow Ice Cream.
So. Gross.


5) What's the best superhero lair and why? Feel free to provide examples.

I'm not familiar with very many superhero lairs and can probably only name a handful.
Batcave. FOS. Watchtower. The FF building (don't know the proper name). I'd have to tie between the Watchtower and the Batcave.
The Batcave because it's cave, and caves are cool (both in temperature and in the neat-o factor), and it's got all of Batsy's gadgets and gear, plus "trophies", and secret access to Stately Wayne Manor, and the Gotham sewers.
The Watchtower (I'm mostly familiar with the JLA cartoon version, but I've read a couple of JLA novels with the Lunar version), because it's not on Earth. Our heros can watch over the planet, and keep a Watch out for interstellar threats as well. Because, if you're gonna be protectors of the human race, you gotta deal with all those outer space nasties, like the Green Lantern Corp. Oh wait....
Oh, and I just thought of G.I. Joe's The Pit from the comic book. A multi-level underground headquarters with many cool things inside. And none of the regular military on the army base above ground even know it's there!


These are fun. Some comments over at MCF are saying this test was too hard.
??
It's not about being easy or difficult. It's about having fun!


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'Twas The Night Before

Earlier this year I reviewed an enjoyably humorous book about being a parent by Tim Bete called "In the Beginning...There Were No Diapers". The author has graciously allowed me (and other bloggers that reviewed the book) to post an entire section from his book.
Tim is a Christian, and it shows through in his love for his children, and in his book. God has given him the gift to make us laugh. That's one of the best gifts.


As an introduction, in the author's email to me, he wrote:
"Every parent has experienced the frustration of assembling kids' Christmas presents long into the wee hours of the morning. My rendition of "'Twas The Night Before Christmas" will make those same parents laugh out loud. I've included it below. It can also be found" here.

'TWAS THE NIGHT BEFORE CHRISTMAS (BATTERIES NOT INCLUDED)
by Tim Bete

'Twas the night before Christmas, when all through the house,
Not a creature was stirring, not even my spouse;
With only six hours left, until morning light,
Assembling kids' presents would take me all night.

19,000 pieces -- bolts, washers and screws,
To be put together, and me with no clue;
All I had for tools were some needle-nose pliers,
A Swiss Army Knife and a Phillips screwdriver.

When out on the lawn there arose such a racket,
I threw down my pliers and put on my jacket;
I swung open the door, to check out the noise,
And saw a red-suited man, bringing more toys.

I shouted, "Hey, you on my lawn, what's the idea!"
As my shrubs were being eaten by eight small reindeer;
The big man looked up at me and said with a smile,
"There's more to assemble -- it will take you a while."

"My kids don't need more toys," I countered right quick,
But he wouldn't hear "no," that stubborn Saint Nick;
"These new toys have detailed instructions," he said,
And he winked as he lifted a bag from his sled.

Then he pulled a bunch of woodchips out of his bag,
"It's a dollhouse," he said, as he looked at the tag;
"It has 6,000 small pieces, plus one or two,
You can make it if you have a gallon of glue."

"And, there are no axle holes on this toy car,
With only two wheels it won't go very far;
Perhaps you can whip up some rubber for tires,
I'm sure you can do it before you retire."

"But Nick," I pleaded, "don't you have simple toys?
Can't they build simply things -- those elves you employ?"
"How 'bout a ball, a rag doll or gun that shoots darts,
Or some other present made of only one part?"

Santa said, "Those kinds of toys are passé these days,
It's complicated gadgets that are all the craze;
So, please take these here toys and I'll be on my way,
I have houses to get to and visits to pay."

"I don't want any more toys!" I yelled quite in shock,
Then I slammed the door shut and I secured the lock;
And I took off my coat and went back to my bench,
And tried to read the directions -- printed in French.

Then just as I found I was missing a screw,
That old coot came sneaking right down through my flue;
"You forgot all these toys," said the man dressed in red,
Then he put his sack right down and here's what he said.

"You're not alone staying up all through the night,
Dads all over the world are in the same plight;
They don't have the right tools, or any instructions,
They're eyes are bleary and they're minds don't quite function."

Then he left me there speechless, alone with my work,
And filled all the stockings, then turned with a jerk;
And laying his finger aside of his nose,
And giving a nod, up the chimney he rose.

He sprang to his sleigh, to his team gave a whistle,
And away they all flew like the down of a thistle;
But I heard him exclaim, as he jumped in his sleigh,
"You'll need 62 batteries -- all triple A."

Excerpted from In the Beginning...There Were No Diapers by Tim Bete, ©2005. Used with permission of the publisher, Sorin Books, an imprint of Ave Maria Press. Available at bookstores, online retailers, 800-282-1865 and www.sorinbooks.com. More of Tim's work can be read at www.TimBete.com.


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Monday, December 05, 2005

Thanks, Kristie!

Kristie K, a dear internet friend of mine, posted this in her blog. Love it. Thanks Kristie!

http://kristiegk.blogspot.com/2005/12/so-sad-but-so-true.html#comments


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Sunday, December 04, 2005

It could be worse

Just when I start thinking things are looking rather grim, God uses others to point out to me that, in reality, I've got it pretty good.

Last night at Bible study, one prayer request was for a young lady that has a rapidly growing brain tumor and was given three to five years to live. She has a husband and a baby. She'll just be getting to know her child, and that will be that.

All the tornado victims in our area that lost everything. Everything. And then the people who thought they just had some simple damage find out from inspectors that their houses weren't built to code and now have to be demolished.

And, in an email from a work-related newsletter, I get the following:
ADOPT A DISPATCH FAMILY FOR THE HOLIDAYS
911 Cares has instituted an "adoption" program for dispatchers affected by Hurricane Katrina and their families. Most families are in need of clothing, food, and general household items. A list of families can be found on the 911 Cares website, and if you would like to adopt a family, you may contact Lisa at 650-595-5202, x103 for a detailed list of your chosen family's needs. Please be aware that the deadline to adopt a family is December 8th. Every little bit helps; we thank you for your generosity this holiday season.

So there Kev... you've got it pretty good compared to the people really suffering.
Now shut up.


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